Odd compliment of the month: "you will be so cute pregnant."
Uhhh...? That's semi-flattering but in a weird way.
Today was hard again. Every day brings it's new little challenges and some days are harder than others. Today was the one week mark and I felt so angry. Memories kept flooding back and I was struggling to keep my composure all day. My friend added me to a Facebook group, Missionary Girls, that made me envious of the girls with only a few weeks left and the girls that have no trouble waiting. No, I'm not waiting but I'm jealous that they know what they want and where they're going. And then I stumbled across some chicks blog who talked about her missionary experiences and whatever but everything about this girl pissed me off. It all culminated in a feeling of slow-boiling anger toward the Lord. Anger towards missions. Anger towards my stupid heart for ever falling for his stupid face. I shouldn't be angry; it's completely illogical and uncalled for. If I'm feeling that kind of anger than it's either PMS or the Adversary working on me. Well, we can eliminate one of those. These past couple days I have been doing so much spiritual growth, so it only makes sense that he would want to hinder that. I can't believe I'm letting him get to me like this. I seriously feel so angry right now. I need to sleep this off.
Pray for me, I'm struggling.
