Did you hear the breaking of my heart when you said it was over?
If I cry out to you loud enough will you hear me then?
The only thing I want you to answer is: WHY?
Can you hear me sobbing that question over and over again to you across the miles and miles we're separated physically and that you've separated yourself from me emotionally? Why, Collin? I just want to know, why? I can take however hurtful it is. What I can't take is never knowing the truth.
I knew you better than anyone, Collin, can you hear that? Can you hear that I knew you better than anyone and still loved you? Can you hear me begging you to at least try to work this out with me in person? Can you hear me acknowledging my mistakes but questioning how they amounted to this? Can you hear the way I talked about you?! As if you were flawless and the most perfect man I'd ever loved? Can you hear the pounding that every tear drop that has furiously driven itself down my heartbroken face makes when it hits the floor? Can you hear the sincerity in my voice when I say that I would do anything to have you back? Can you hear yourself thinking too much again, dear? The way you always do? The way you always create a problem that wasn't there to begin with because you over-think? Can you hear the logic in my saying that maybe you panicked, thought it out too much, and broke up with me when you shouldn't have? Can you hear the honesty when I say that I am sincerely apologetic for anything I did to upset or offend you and make you not want me any more? Can you hear the irregular beating of my heart every time I remember I have to live without you from now on?Can you hear the sound of us laughing and talking and singing and smiling and being happy and in love together? Can you hear me quietly singing that song to you on our way to Salt Lake? The way we both believed every word? Can you hear me complimenting you and expressing my happiness with you and loving you through your faults like I did every moment we spent together? Can you hear me on the phone at 430 am just waking up to drive you to work? Can you hear the the loving silence of me listening to everything you said from your sports to your roommates to your drama to your complex inner thoughts? Can you hear the way I would have supported and encouraged and believed in you through your dance team and gold auditions, your hard work hours, your triumphs in becoming a better person, your communications classes, your struggles with your parents, your determination to do summer sales, and your goal to get better grades?
Can you hear the way I loved you?
Can you hear the way I loved you?
Can you hear what you've lost, Collin?
Hear it?
I'm screaming it out to you across the oblivion but I'm not sure you're listening.
