{DISCLAIMER: This does not happen to everybody or at every first-impression-making-encounter, [only about 40% of the time does it happen really] but usually happens, and is not limited to, the following circumstances: in the presence of attractive men, large groups of strangers,  small groups of strangers, those I wish to impress, those I find intimidating, when I'm nervous or overly confident, when the sun is out, on Tuesdays at 3:00 am or pm, every day of my life.}

I'm really great at first impressions.

People meet me and are like,

"wow, she's so cool/pretty/funny/talented!

I sure want to get to know her better!"

See? The first impression worked.

Unfortunately, they're so impressed by that first time that they go back for a second.

Big mistake.

When that whole first impression thing goes down I lay out the best cards.

What you see is the best I get.

That first impression is the climax, the pinnacle of my good characteristics.

By the time you see me next everything will be a downgrade.

It's like false advertising.

But not.

So, basically I'm really great at first impressions.

And... that's about it.